Flow 4.12: You are the chooser
In which, the guides explain how small experiences can leave lasting scars and unpack the micro-trauma of commercial messaging and offer words of encouragement and healing.
The guidance begins before I open my eyes:
It’s time to give up the story of your broken parents and look for their other story - there is always another story. In a world where no one is broken, it is out of alignment to continue to hold this story as real. There is always another story - time to look.
The one where they were and are heroes and so am I.
Time to give up their story altogether and step into your own.
Yes, it’s not about them, it’s about me now.
Time to integrate their story, knowing who they are and who you are. Trusting that their story was a love story - no matter what they said or thought about it. Every story is a love story - the story of love emerging into a world of love.
I fall asleep and wake again. This time, there is this message:
We caution you now. It is not in your interest to see and to know all there is to know.
They show me the enormous responsibility of one who sees all. They remind me what happens when Psyche looks upon Cupid’s face. What happens? I can’t remember now that I’m awake. They showed me in a dream. In the dream, I knew: We cannot know the secrets of the dream world or we will be lost. We have to learn first to dream.
It’s been about a week since the last transmission. I sit in the sun room. Mooky is insistent, head banging me, shoving her paw into my lap. Now climbing onto my lap and settling in. She means to hold me here a good long time. With the heat off for spring, my lap is the warmest spot in the house on this rainy day.
I sit with her, and gladly, feeling the presence of a message gathering, the way a crowd encircles a street performer. I am not a performer. I shake off this image. I am a listener. A bridge. These distinctions feel important to me as Mooky’s purring lulls me into the meditative receptivity I will need in order to receive the message.
And I do want to receive these messages. As I write that, my awareness responds instantly, shifting to listen for the thread of the messenger.
And are you ready to begin, the guide asks?
And I say that I am.
And so we begin.
You are the chooser.
I am here with you and you are here with me and this is the one voice and we are called Nathaniel. And we will say that today we have named ourself so that Amy is less overwhelmed by our many voices which speak together and now she will hear us as one chord, with one name.
And she is uncertain whether we said that we are named Nathaniel or Daniel and she is getting caught up in that question. And you, Reader, following along, will feel and understand that though the message will be the same whichever name she discerns (because we are speaking as a collective) the name which she selects to represent us will have certain vibratory ramifications – and its rate/frequency will affect her relationship with the messenger and with the message.
So, while it seems a small matter, it does matter – for each name conjures (calls into form/constellates) around itself a certain quality of being. And you will feel certain things toward ‘Daniel’ than you will not feel toward ‘Nathaniel’ and we are demonstrating this to Amy with sensations in her body.
And Amy is noticing that the name ‘Daniel’ feels strong and resonates with the qualities of Leader and Liberator and, bears with it a kind of Authority, whereas the name ‘Nathaniel’ has qualities of Poet and Artist and Teacher, and carries the energy of Inclusion and Curiosity and ‘being with.’
So Nathaniel is an easier feeling for her- and she is more comfortable with this name but she senses, also. the need of the qualities that the name of Daniel will lend to this project.
And so we are re-minding her that we are not our name, and that we are both Daniel and Nathaniel, and that, in naming we are attempting, only to help her to recognize our thread of vibration among the many threads. And also to demonstrate how naming a thing changes its vibrational quality in the perception of the one who encounters it. And this will be a foundation of our message today.
And now we will see now if we can move the message along and through.
There is pressure in Amy’s body – in the lower belly – and we are adjusting for that now; there is a kind of suction occurring there as she was frustrated by our choice to take on a name today. She has said, in the past, that she does not hear the names of angels; and, that she does not hear our voices with her physical ears but that will be different now. (And we pause to re-mind her of yesterday’s healing* and she stops to integrate this – to absorb it/to take it in. And she remembers that during the healing, she heard, very clearly, the deep baritone of Archangel Michael, whose voice she has only, until now, heard in dreams – and as a vibratory ‘voice’ while she is awake.
The guides remind me of the healing of a childhood wound
*We re-mind Amy that during the healing, she came to understand that she did not trust her own knowing of us and that she had erected boundaries to block the full flow of call and response with us. As a result, she has not trusted that when she calls for us and senses us drawing near that we are real. And this has slowed our conversation and hampered our ability to flow with her. And we rejoice that she is doing this healing and whole-ing work, which removed/drew out a layer (veil/wound) of separation/ misunderstanding, which was taken on (absorbed) by Amy as a child of four and yes, it is still healing and Amy is feeling a flash of pain in her left ear as she re-members:
And as we witness and hold this re-membrance with her, the pain rises and is re-leased into the wholeness of blessing: And she was four and placed in the hospital for surgery. And it was a big open room and she was in a crib and there were other children in other cribs and she remembers thinking: they are babies but I am not a baby and why am I in a crib! And she remembers feeling insulted by that and very, very angry that her parents had abandoned her there – and that no one would come when she screamed and cries. And she felt angry that when finally they did come, they gave her a painful hypodermic injection. Betrayal after betrayal. She was there after a year of painful ear infections and she is remembering this now, which is causing interference in our connection and we are asking her to step aside and to allow us to tell the story and she is in accord with that.
These infections/congestions of the ears; and, the trouble with her back teeth and the layers of pain in the throat and difficulties with the voice are symptoms of resistance experienced by the sensitive child who would be, even then, hearing and flowing with us. And she would have been sensitive to disturbing words overheard or spoken in anger toward her – and, in keeping with her nature, she would have been led to help and to translate our message of love, even then – because this was her way and she was learning to find and to follow it. And frustrated, in this case, betrayed, when she was not heard.
As it is, it was. As it was, it will be. And so it is for all children – for each child is here with her/his own instrumentation/lens/focusing tools (and we search for a word string to demonstrate our meaning) and the word that we select/that is closest to our meaning is ‘body’ and Amy laughs - and we laugh with her.
For yes, dear reader, your body is a lens, a focusing tool. Your body is your 'instrumentation', as it were, for perceiving the world in which you live.
Every child is a gift of love
Every child is a gift of love, emerging in a world of love, here to deliver the gift of love through the flowing and the following of joy, Here to em-body the experience of love and joy. To find its way inside of the world of forms and feelings.
Amy has called this the ‘world of fields and flows’ and this is a good name, as it expresses the meaning inside of the words. Like a picture. This is why those who serve as vessel/messenger/channel for our flow materials are so often poets. Poetry is the meeting and the merging of form and image. As such, poets are often mystics and mystics are often poets. For these are one and the same in their essential intention to rest/dwell at the edge between the two worlds: the world of the unseen (invisible) and the world of forms (manifest, visible things).
And so, as children, mystics and poets may struggle with maladies of the head and throat, ears and voice, jaw and back teeth, and maladies in speech and speaking. As Dykshoorn (the psychic who named Amy*) showed Amy when she was 28-29, the back of the head at the base point of the skull, which much troubled him when he was working with flowing energy – and with seeing.
While our message is always the same, these things are imprecise when crossing into the physical, especially the human body in all of its manifestations/forms but there are patterns, which tend to be consistent. As Amy has learned, by watching the responses in her own body, congestion in the head is often related to withheld tears. (And we will say that pain is always the effect of withheld/blocked/un-moving energy. Tears, words, enthusiasms, anger. Inspiration and Emotion are meant to move.)
And now the guides explain 'The Flow’
We are here and you are here to ease the message across the veil. The perceived veil between our world and yours. We say that the veil is perceived because in truth, our world is in your world, as your world is within ours, like water in a sponge; Like grains soaking in a cooking pot, wherein 'the flow' (as water) is absorbed into a solid (each grain of rice, for example) even as the water also flows around the individual grains.
And so we are here, as we have always been, a flow of radiant love and joy which is also soaking into you and being absorbed by you. And as you absorb it, you become saturated with it and radiate it as yourself.
And let us now take this word “Radiance” and show it to you – for that is another reason we are so often received by mystics and poets: they like words. And they are already curious about language, and our message, which is carried in a an undifferentiated flow of light (or energy) as the frequency of pure love, which contains the raw materials/building blocks of all form, as white light contains all of the colors. So the flow must be translated into word pictures, drawn from the images and sense impressions that occur when our stream meets your physical bodies.
In other words, your bodies receive and interpret the one stream of the flow into different impressions. Your eyes receive and interpret the flow as light, color, image. Your ears receive and interpret the same flow as sound. Your bodies experience the flow as shifts in pressure, pulsations, temperature and texture, and as vibrations (as with a drum line in music) which feels, to the body, like an invitation to move, to dance. And yet, the flow is one stream and each layered sense of your body experiences the flow (the everything all at once) in its own way.
The guides use my breakfast to give a lesson on perception
Look at this breakfast. It is as it is: a scrambled egg on a plate. Yet even as you see it with your eyes, your other senses are receiving it in their way. Your nostrils detect the scent of oil, of spices. Your tongue tastes its flavor, texture and temperature. Your ears hear the sound of your fork against the plate.
At the same time, your mind asks: Is this good? Is it healthy? Is it my usual breakfast or something new? Can I trust the farmer, the food seller, the cook? Shall I eat this? (And even as your senses are experiencing the egg on the plate, your body is also gauging the temperature of the breeze as it flows through the open window behind you and the smell of the coffee brewing and the shifting shadows of morning light in the room.)
So many micro-observations are made at once; and out of these, so many choices. And all of this a function of the human being in the human body meeting the plate of eggs which rests before it.
And all of this, from reading the frequencies of color and texture, taste and smell, to make a single choice: is this good? Shall I allow this to pass from outside of my body to the inside? In other words, can I bless this?
In this way do you meet all things that you encounter, moving through the flow, meeting what meets you and deeming it good (blessed) or bad (condemned) or irrelevant (unnoticed). The human being selects, absorbs and assimilates, opening to the flow in its variety of forms, choosing or rejecting what is here, without really noticing she is doing so.
And you are always choosing, always ingesting and assimilating the gifts of the flow in its myriad forms. (And Amy is pointing out that all of this happens inside of the context and awareness (the field) of your time and place: this morning, this kitchen, this house. And the awareness that you are part of wider fields of family and community, skin color and political party, age group and socio-economic status.
And the awareness that you are part of ‘contexts’ and affiliations/identifications, including your identification as a human being. And we re-mind you that each of these contexts is a name and a way of dividing the world (which is one flow) into separate parts. And that all names, ultimately dissolve and become the one name, the one flow. What you, Amy have called ‘The Sea of Miracles’.)
A reminder of why we are here
And here we will remark/point out that part of our intent for this book and this particular conversation with humanity at this time, is to re-mind you that you get to choose - and that you ARE choosing - actively, always. You are choosing what you allow into your mouth, into your ears, into your eyes, into your mind. You are choosing how to relate and respond to all that you take in. You are choosing which context/ field you affiliate with.
You are sitting before a banquet table laden with the bounty of all the world’s flavors and colors, all the world’s textures and sounds, all the world’s stories and songs and you, each of you, are the chooser.
You are the chooser
Now we can feel your collective argument with this and we will address that here, now. No matter what has happened to you in the past, you are the chooser of that. No matter what is happening now, you are the chooser of this. Even when what you encounter is not wanted – not good – still you are choosing it. You are not choosing it consciously. It is not your fault. You are choosing it by not yet understanding that you might choose its alternative. You are choosing it by remaining unconscious of the truth: you are the chooser.
This is not your fault but it is the truth. And this, not-choosing is the way of not-joy.
You have not learned/been taught how to make choices that are led by joy. The joy of following your own true nature. In truth, your schools and your media have trained you in the opposite way – the way of consumer. The way of consumer is a way of remaining open to commercial messages – as if under a spell. And it IS a spell – for as your social psychologists and 'consumer scientists' apply their methods for the purposes of their employers wish to sell you their products, testing what works and does not work, they do not understand (yet) that their method of activating a ‘pain point’ and then presenting their product as relief of that pain is actually activating pain – it is causing pain: the pain of separation from blessing - and pain always calls for healing.
Pain always calls for healing
True healers know that every action has its effects. That “everything has a front and a back,” as Amy’s acupuncturist has taught her. And this is what that means. Your mystics know, and so do your children, that when you cause pain to another, your own heart feels a pinch of pain.
The guides explain micro-trauma
When a commercial message hits you – it is as if a small gash had been made in your energy field, a micro-wound out of which the energy of your empowerment begins to leak. As power leaks (bleeds) out, the pathogens of separation can cross within. And these pathogens are viral messages of separation. Now this is not a deliberate attack – not a wounding with intent to do harm. It is a mindless (unconscious) manipulation of the ways of ‘magic’, of the misappropriation of the flow of mind energy and the misunderstanding of its consequences. It is an example of how harm is done when the chooser (the maker of the message) is unconscious (unaware) of the choice being made.
The choice to activate a ‘pain point’ (causing the viewer to feel shame, exclusion, anger) and then create a connection in the mind of the consumer between your product and relief of the pain that you caused is the choice to manipulate the sensitive and responsive nature of the human being for your own gain.
This is, by its nature, an act of spell-casting, a kind of mass hypnosis. You are hypnotizing your audience, using sophisticated shamanic tools such as drumbeats, emotionally-evocative music, disturbing images and stirring stories to ‘hook’ and shock (upset) audience members and then you are soothing them with images of relief (togetherness, beauty, safety) and then quickly showing your product to create a connection in the mind of the ‘consumer’ between relief and your product.
And why do we make such a fuss about this? when as you might say, ‘everyone knows the difference between a commercial, which is not real and a news program, which is real.’
And to this we say simply: Reducing another human being (the audience member) to the level of ‘consumer’ is a renaming - it takes them (in your perception) out of the flow of the wholeness of blessing’ and outside of the ‘tribe’, as it were, of those who must be respectfully, gently, humanely held. And once they are separated from the tribe you are free (in your perception) to do as you like with them. For they are not ‘one of us’. As ‘consumer’ they are no longer ‘human being”.
This is the justification for all forms of terrorism, violence against ‘the other,” renaming human beings as consumers so that you can manipulate their emotions and get them to purchase your products; which opens this seemingly harmless activity - ‘just a commercial message’ - to new understanding.
This is a world of inclusion
This is a misunderstanding of the nature of this world. For this is a world of inclusion where no one is separate from blessing. And yet, here is the truth, which you must understand: that which you do to your brother is also done to you. Not by divine proclamation or punishment, not by avenging angels on horseback. No, this renaming you would make of your neighbor is a renaming of yourself. For by renaming out of blessing, you rename yourself and rename the world.
Where once you dwelt in a world of blessing where all were included in blessing and all were good, now (after this renaming) you dwell in a world of condemnation and exile (a world that you made) where it is possible to be separated from blessing. In such a world, where one may be separated, anyone may be separated. When you exile another, your heart instantly understands that this is also possible for you. As such, you exile yourself.
By separating another from perfection – from blessing – you instantly separate yourself (in your mind) from the world of all is one. We re- call that ancient teaching of all faiths, the golden rule, the law of do unto others. For it was law and so it is still law.
This is why we make our fuss. In a world of all is one, the mind/body does not understand the difference between the condemned and the one who condemns. Between the news story and the commercial, between the Real and the appearance of the real.
And yet, “Consumer” is not your name. This is but one of the many names used to hold apart the true self (or the Christed Self) from blessing.
To return to blessing, come home to who you are. You need only to unmask and un-man(ifest) this tool’s influence over your own experience. You need only to re-member that you are the chooser – and that you choose your own way. This is all.
The guides remind us that nothing is wrong.
You do not need to stamp out all commercials. You do not need to prove that this news story is false. You don’t need to uncloak all those you would condemn as ‘villains’. The only cloak is the one you keep over your own head.
This name (villians) is just more renaming. More condemnation. There are no villains and nor are there saviors. Nothing separates you from love but your own refusal to make conscious choices. And lo, even this does not separate you for in truth, you are never separate from love.
Though you have been told, all of your life, that you are separate, though you have been convinced (at great expense) that you don’t matter and that the only way to matter (to be visible) is to buy more things, you are still, always, loved, included and blessed.
Though you have been told that you were born broken, born into sin, and that the only way to be good is to follow rules and avoid punishment, still, you are loved, included and blessed.
You were born perfect. A bright and beautiful light, a gift of love to the world. You are an emissary of love from the one flow, sent to bring more light and joy to the world through your own experience of love and joy.
And though, even now, you may feel alone, separate, unloved, unblessed - still you are loved, blessed and included. We are here with you, as we are here with Amy. All are included in our message of love and blessing, our invitation onto the path to the way of joy.
And so, as Amy grows tired now and must rest and flow nourishment for herself, we close with these words: Love is here with you and you are here with love. And so be it and so it is. Always and on this day.
And Amy reminds us that we would discuss radiance and so we shall and so we will.
And this is how the message came on this day, April 12, 2016.
If you are enjoying The Flow Materials, I’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment, like the posts - and by all means: Ask questions and share your own experiences in the comments.
As the guides have shown me, the more we engage with the work, the more the work expands in us and around us.
Thank you for reading. Sending you so much love.
As I review the Flow Materials, I am increasingly attuning (again) to their message and frequency. As a result, I am rethinking all of my offerings for 2023.
I want everything that I offer to say: You are welcome here.
There, you’ll find Journey, a weekly Zoom call. A walk through your own interior landscape. There’s a tent at the top of a hill. A labyrinth. A forest. This is illuminated work - awakened dreaming.
Bring your journal and your open heart. You are welcome.
Join for the year or join month-to-month.
You’ll find The Well, a monthly gathering for guided meditation, delivered live (in a Zoom call) and then offered by recording. You are welcome.
Join the live call or listen by recording… or both.
There are one-on-one sessions. You are welcome to talk with me about anything, everything. I will listen and tell you what I hear and what I see.
Finally, there will be Salon.
Four week deep dives into juicy things.
I’ll tell you more when I know more.
I look forward to hearing from you - meeting with you.
Warm and bright blessings
Becoming Real. Notes from the field. is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.