Lately, I’m discovering another me. A me who is not afraid.
I find her when I am passing a mirror and I catch my own eye. She looks at me as I am looking at her and some wisdom passes between us - some exchange is taking place.
An acknowledgement. I see you. I know who you are and I’m glad to see you. The surfacing of this conversation - the awareness that I am in relationship to this deeper aspect of my own consciousness makes me feel, how do I say this? It makes me feel real. As if, without her, I was not complete. As if, with her, I am whole.
This strange self-awareness is so pure and simple it seems almost silly. Childlike. Is it even worth talking about. And yet, when I see her and she sees me, I quiet inside. The hyper-vigilance about how I’m doing, how you’re doing, how the world is doing stops churning. The chatter about how I look and how you look settles down.
My breath slows. My body comes to rest. I can hear my thoughts going by. I am always surprised (stunned, actually) by the nonsense that moves unchallenged through my head. Self-criticism: I should be different, they should be different, the world should be different. And all my proposed resolutions - ways to be better, do better, look better. List after list of improvements.
When I’m not paying attention, it’s so noisy inside my head.
Lately, though, she is with me. And I am paying attention.
Lately, when I look into my own eyes in the mirror - into her eyes - I don’t wince away. Instead, clarity comes. I know who I am. I know who she is.
Sometimes, in the mirror, we smile - she and I. We shrug. The first time this happened, I laughed out loud. Mostly now, I smile - at her, at myself, warmly, with great respect and love.
I am not afraid any more. None of the things I am thinking about matter. There is nothing to fear. When I look into her eyes - my own beautiful eyes - I discover I am brave - so brave. And I am free.
Self-realization is a process. We meet ourselves in the mirror, in dreams, in conversations with the people we encounter. We hear ourselves speak and we ask: Where did that come from? We watch ourselves move and we nod. I know her. I know him. This is the evolution of consciousness emerging in daily life. This is the invitation to make your practice in the middle of everyday, in everything you do. In everything you don’t do. This is the way.
The guides smile as I bring this to the page. I feel their smile in the energy. I hear it in their voice. They tell me:
As you adjust to living inside of the message of love and peace, your old habits will become visible to you. As they become visible, they will soften and fall away and you will no longer be able to access the thoughts and feelings you used to take for granted. You will respond in new ways, more genuinely, with more presence. You will be less and less caught in habitual reactive responses, less haunted by re-minders of your past and much more settled inside of yourself. You will shift fully into the message field and the sense that you are splitting will also dissolve. For you are not splitting, you are changing worlds, shifting from the world of fear to dwell fully in the world of love and peace.
As you shift, the layers of your body are adjusting to the higher frequency of the field of our message, you may experience surges in the physical body and emotions. You may feel pressure or zaps of electricity or heat in the body. You may have headache, nausea or vertigo. You may feel weepy or angry. You may swing, inexplicably, from joy to grief and back again. You may see flashes of light or color as the etheric body adjusts.
And yet, as you rest inside the field of our message, you will not be concerned about these occurrences for your awareness is also being heightened and you just know things will be okay. At the same time, certain things will become inaccessible to you. You will not be able to un-know our message - and so even though, in the past, you could take a vacation from kindness, from compassion, now, separation from our message of love will create upheavals.
You will no longer be able to cause fear or suffering to another without feeling it yourself. You will experience more directly the effects of your mirror universe. You will witness, also, the effects of your own thoughts much more directly. You will wish for contact with someone and they will call you - or show up out of the blue.
This is the beginning of living inside the field of love and blessing, the way of joy.
I discover a me who is not afraid
This is so timely. <3